W. C. Fields on TeePublic

In honor of the birthday of The Great Man Himself (this past Friday), I’ve put my Fields-inspired designs up on TeePublic:

Screen Shot 2016-01-30 at 11.46.30 AM

From left to right: Orange crate stencil from “It’s a Gift” with phony distressing and wood grain, New Old Lompoc House door sign from “The Bank Dick,” and the orange crate stencil ‘like new’ with no grain or distressing.

“My grandfather’s last words, just before they sprung the trap, were: “You can’t cheat an honest man, never give a sucker an even break, or smarten up a chump.”

For Sale: New Old Lompoc House Shirts!

Recreated from a screencap of the art very briefly seen on the front doors.

Available in your choice of 3 tasteful color combinations:


Incidentally, Lompoc (properly pronounced “Lom-poke”) is a real town in California, started as a temperance town in 1888. Which may be why “Uncle Bill” is poking a little fun at it here.

For Sale: Bissonette’s Blue Bird Oranges Stencil!

Based on these crates seen here:shot0002

I’ve recreated the stencil art, like this:

bissonettes_stencil_rectangular_sticker-r92cd8d7eaba44b8b9b8466e72a6691c0_v9wxo_8byvr_512 bbbo

For the faux-woodgrain sticker, there is a modest amount of phony distressing to the blue art. For the t-shirts, there is no distressing; they are clean and razor-sharp. If you would prefer a distressed version of the shirt art, just ask.

The Bank Dick (1940): W. C. Fields’ Prop Newspaper

The Lompoc Picayune Intelligencer:

Note the bizarre-sounding filler article: Convicts Unguarded on Kansas Island. Obviously somebody’s idea of a joke, right? Nope:

Screen Shot 2015-09-09 at 11.37.20 PM copy

It’s a real AP wire story from the 1930’s. Oddly enough, it shows up in another prop newspaper as well, which is where the above color image comes from. The original Mission: Impossible TV show, I think. Note that the type is set identically. So, this little clipping was kicking around Hollywood for a good long while. Earl Hays Press, is this your handiwork?

The Golf Specialist (W. C. Fields) Wanted Poster

Not a great short, but OK. Most of the golfing gags will be reused in a film, though I forget which one. I do like this poster, though it’s too bad we don’t get a better look at it:


I like the enormous lists of aliases and wanted fors. Here are the aliases I can make out:

Dirty Deal Duffy, Rev. D. D. Dunk, Capt. (?) Rufus Durfry, Bishop (?) O’Brien, ??? … J. Edward Frost (?)

Looks like there’s an Admiral in there, and a Sailor, and a Prince, and a General, too.

And the ‘wanted fors:’

??? Manslaughter, Homicide, Assault, Grand Larceny, Petty Larceny, ???

(Start of next line obscured) Arson, Kidnapping, Highway Robbery, ???, etc.

Apparently completely different from the crimes on the poster are the ‘joke’ crimes shown in closeup immediately after: